It's been almost a month since our Youth Venture group has parted, and I've done plenty of reflecting. I've found though that I am having a difficult time putting the experience into writing. For me, the queen of words, this comes as quite the surprise. As I was preparing to share with my home congregation, I found myself getting frustrated that I couldn't explain everything well enough, or share all of the lessons I had learned. Perhaps it is simply that the experience is too holy for words. Are there ever words to describe God? And really, isn't that what we encountered in LA - God? So now, faced with the impossible task again, I think I shall focus on describing some of the lessons I learned, instead of the experience itself.
Lesson number one: it's important to follow the calling of the soul, and to surrender ourselves to float in the current of God's will. For each of us in the group, it seemed random that we ended up in LA. I came because I was scrolling through my Facebook feed, saw a post about the trip, and felt an instant pull to go. Tess came because she heard about the trip on a blog. Matthew came because his cousin urged him to go on the trip. Jordan came because Matthew told him about it. Tayllor was supposed to go to Africa, but the doors closed to that and opened to LA. I had a feeling soon into the trip that God brought us all together for a reason. From the very first day, the group felt like family, like home. Though we may never meet again, or as a group at least, each person: Tess, Matthew, Jordan, Maya, and Tayllor, they all have a special place in my heart. God brought us together for service and learning and late night heart to hearts.
Lesson two: we're all family. This was a recurring theme of this trip. It felt like wherever we went, we were welcomed and treated like family - and in reality we were! The vastness of God's family astounds and touches my insignificant heart. To travel across the country and still feel a sense of welcome and belonging - it is amazing. We were welcomed into Maranatha's congregation during a tender time as they said goodbye to their beloved youth pastor, and we were allowed the privilege of standing by and listening to the memories and seeing the tears. We got to hear prayers and share in the holy moments of community. We were treated like family. It was the same at Family Mennonite. From that first Sunday morning, we were showered with hugs and blessings from everyone in the congregations. They allowed us to join with them in their Vacation Bible School ministry, and they welcomed us into their lives that week. We got to hang out with the youth like old friends, and be blessed by the elders as if we were their own youth.
Lesson numero tres: it feels good to be loved. As I was telling a friend about some of our experiences in LA, and the warmth of the greetings that we received everywhere we went, she said, "It feels good to be loved, doesn't it?" Why yes, it does. It feels great to be loved, and what we received in LA felt even better because it wasn't our tiny human love, it was God's love. We weren't loved for who we are or what we can offer or we've done or anything like that. We were loved from the very first moment because we are children of God, and nothing has ever felt better. To be loved feels wonderful, don't get me wrong! It feels great to be loved by parents and friends and people who know us deeply, but there is something holy and special about being loved by people who know nothing more than your name, if even that! As Mumford and Sons says, "Love: it will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free, make you more like the man you were meant to be." Love feels good friends.
Lessons number four: Humility is the most beautiful thing. During the Sunday morning English service, there was a sharing time, and something happened that makes me tear up still, even as I write this. A man shared about his landlord whose baby granddaughter was recently diagnosed with cancer. Last month, he had offered to pray for her, and the landlord accepted. A month later, when he went back to pay his rent again, he asked about the little girl only to hear that things had gotten worse. The man said that he would say another prayer for her, and the landlord slammed the door in his face. Many Christians I know would respond to this situation with arrogance. They would pray for the "nonbeliever" or the "unsaved" like they were on a higher moral pedestal, or that his man was somehow less for not wanting prayers for the soul crushing situation he was faced with. This man who was sharing was so different though. He asked for prayer for his landlord, that he could know God's love throughout this time and then he said something that touched my heart, "I hope I didn't do God a disservice." This man's humility was strikingly beautiful. What would the world be like if more Christians were concerned about truly serving God and loving others, instead of getting on our cloud of judgement?
Lesson five: Service isn't about feeling productive or accomplished or anything like that. There were many times on this trip that we realized how little we mattered in terms of what we could offer to the people that we "served". I mean, we quickly realized;that although we were serving Maranatha, without us they still could organize a VBS. The families at the Korean Housechurch could get a babysitter. The Peace and Justice Academy could have students or parents do the tasks that we did. Family Mennonite could easily pull off VBS without our help, and Maranatha youth could've painted their new youth room. The service wasn't about us and how great and talented we were. We weren't especially needed for being us. We simply helped out, or checked things off of somebody else's to do list, but by the end of the trip, we realized that the heart of service lies in the little things. As Mother Teresa once said, "Be faithful in the small things, for it is in them that your strength lies." It could've been easy to get discouraged on this trip by how "unneeded" we were, and how little we could give back to the people that gave us so much, but we helped where we could, and we were faithful in the small things. On one Saturday, as Tess and I were scrubbing the walls of numerous classrooms at the Peace and Justice academy, it seemed like our actions were fruitless and pointless. Moving along with growing discouragement, I found a poster that changed my whole outlook on the day. It was a Ghandi quote that read, "Of course what you are doing is insignificant, but it is important that you do it anyway. " Can I get an amen? What we did on this trip was entirely insignificant, but it was so important that we did it anyway. Last but not least, number six: home is a feeling not a place. Home is where family is, whether it be biological, or spiritual. Though it was thousands of miles from my bed, Los Angeles was just as much home as Lansdale, Pennsylvania is. I felt at home and at peace during our two weeks in sunny California. I saw and felt God's love everywhere I turned, and met new family every day. Los Angeles has a special place in my memories and my heart, and I hope to someday (hopefully even soon) return to my West coast family. I thank everyone that we met from the bottom of my heart. The hospitality, kindness, and love that you showered on us was extravagant, and don't think that it went unnoticed or unappreciated. I love you, and hope that we will someday meet again. I look forward to someday being able to welcome you into my town and my life like you welcomed me to yours.
Until we meet again,
Your sister in Christ,
Beth
